roger the cat, clango : cat butt sleeping zzz butthole kitty, what is the meaning of life? besides feeding you, i mean.

The Meaning of Everymeal

Kitty, what is the meaning of life?

– @rstevens



pale suzie : drinking coffee : r2-d2 whistling why does coffee taste better out of your skull? you're not even one of my enemies! that's very sweet of you to say. but i'm pretty sure you'd defeat my evil plans every time!

My Lovely Nemesis

QUESTION: Why does coffee taste better out of your skull?

– @rstevens



pale suzie : drinking coffee : r2-d2 whistling r2's head pops up brews coffee drip drip smiles

Sing to Me

Tonight’s comic is Whistling in the Dark Roast.

– @rstevens



pale suzie : drinking coffee looking at camera oh, hello! i didn't see you there. that's why i was smiling. SCOWLS

The Joy of Drinking Alone

Oh, hello! I didn't see you there.

– @rstevens



indie rock pete, pale suzie : drinking coffee he disappears i bet you can't give up coffee for a week. i bet i don't consider suffering to have intrinsic moral value! how am i supposed to judge people if suffering isn't cool? one more word and i'll stop believing that you exist. instantaneously...

Reality is What You Can Get Me to Agree With

Today's comic contains the last word on the concept of suffering. Please update your philosophies and/or religions.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens



indie rock pete, csstine : why can't i- stop it right there. you don't get to ask me for help that i don't want to give. no, i just- you don't get to put the burden of jerk on me, guy. but i only wanted to- begone, bearded devil!

Burden of Proust

Today's comic doesn't get to make your problems into our problems.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens



indie rock pete, csstine : hey, can i pick your brain about something? keep your creepy fingers out of my head skeleton! i just want to ask for some advice! only i am allowed to eat my brain!! but i only- my thought meat is not food for your perverted appetites! why are you being so difficult? cannibalism should be difficult.

Nose Pickers

Today's comic wants to pick your brain.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens



maura, metal steve : what's wrong, stevie? i think i may have accidentally doomed humanity. congrats! great work. why do people keep saying that? because we've met humanity.

You Can't Undo It!

Today's comic may have accidentally doomed humanity.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens



red robot, metal steve, pale suzie : arms up, smile, human! quickly! what does pooping feel like? i'll never tell! you'll just use the secret of pooping against me. how could i possibly use knowledge of pooping to destroy humanity? oh! that's such a relief. gotcha. shit.

Forbidden Knowledge

HUMAN! QUICKLY! WHAT DOES POOPING FEEL LIKE???

What have we here?!

– @rstevens



metal steve, pale suzie : what do you put in your coffee? hopes. dreams. minimal water. i like whipped cream, cheetos dust and caramel syrup! i call it a chester cheetah du leche! i used to believe that none of us were truly beyond hope.

Crimes Against Caffeinity

Tonight's comic wants to know what you put in your coffee.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens



indie rock pete, metal steve, lil sis : across panels so it turns out the reason she doesn't like hanging out with me is because she's an introvert. no it isn't. i always knew that deep down, the problem isn't me- it's other people. NOT IT ISN'T.

Introblurt

Tonight's comic goes out to all the misdiagnosed introverts out there.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens



indie rock pete, lil sis : why don't you want to hang out? am i not fun?! it's not you, it's- -how much work it is to pretend to be nice to you. i knew it wasn't me!

Work, Friends

Tonight's comic wants to know why you don't want to hang out.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens



indie rock pete, lil sis : hey! doctor p.! i thought we were hanging out earlier. i didn't see your text. i emailed you. oh, right. that message went to spam. but you saw the email. this is easier than saying i don't want to hang out.

Scheduling Conflicts

Tonight's comic is having scheduling conflicts.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens



metal steve, lil sis : how are things? that is a great question! you're not going to answer? why risk making things worse?

Optimal Pessimism

So- How are things? (This is a conversation I have almost daily.)

What have we here?!

– @rstevens



otakate, lil sis : everything is terrible and i hate it. turn that frown inside-out! when things are bad, it's important to stay positive! you just don't want to hear me complain. that's one of many positive side effects!

The Blight Side of Life

Tonight's comic is about staying positive!!!!!!!

What have we here?!

– @rstevens



clango, red robot : feelings. misinterpretation of feelings as personal attack. reiteration of feelings. escalation of defensive response! pause to reflect feelings. how come you never open up to me? thought balloon

Infernal Dialogue

Tonight's comic is about feelings

What have we here?!

– @rstevens



metal steve, clango : the internet isn't working anymore. granted it has turned into a giant negativity machine... but i still like to think that the result of all these human connections is a net positive. i just need you to reboot the router. listen, i don't have enough positivity left that you can go around wasting it.

How to Fix the Internet

Tonight's comic knows how to fix the internet!

What have we here?!

– @rstevens





SECRET SHIRT DO NOT CLICK



roger the cat, clango : cat butt sleeping zzz butthole kitty, what is the meaning of life? besides feeding you, i mean.

The Meaning of Everymeal

Kitty, what is the meaning of life?

– @rstevens


pale suzie : drinking coffee : r2-d2 whistling why does coffee taste better out of your skull? you're not even one of my enemies! that's very sweet of you to say. but i'm pretty sure you'd defeat my evil plans every time!

My Lovely Nemesis

QUESTION: Why does coffee taste better out of your skull?

– @rstevens


pale suzie : drinking coffee : r2-d2 whistling r2's head pops up brews coffee drip drip smiles

Sing to Me

Tonight’s comic is Whistling in the Dark Roast.

– @rstevens


pale suzie : drinking coffee looking at camera oh, hello! i didn't see you there. that's why i was smiling. SCOWLS

The Joy of Drinking Alone

Oh, hello! I didn't see you there.

– @rstevens


indie rock pete, pale suzie : drinking coffee he disappears i bet you can't give up coffee for a week. i bet i don't consider suffering to have intrinsic moral value! how am i supposed to judge people if suffering isn't cool? one more word and i'll stop believing that you exist. instantaneously...

Reality is What You Can Get Me to Agree With

Today's comic contains the last word on the concept of suffering. Please update your philosophies and/or religions.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens


indie rock pete, csstine : why can't i- stop it right there. you don't get to ask me for help that i don't want to give. no, i just- you don't get to put the burden of jerk on me, guy. but i only wanted to- begone, bearded devil!

Burden of Proust

Today's comic doesn't get to make your problems into our problems.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens


indie rock pete, csstine : hey, can i pick your brain about something? keep your creepy fingers out of my head skeleton! i just want to ask for some advice! only i am allowed to eat my brain!! but i only- my thought meat is not food for your perverted appetites! why are you being so difficult? cannibalism should be difficult.

Nose Pickers

Today's comic wants to pick your brain.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens


maura, metal steve : what's wrong, stevie? i think i may have accidentally doomed humanity. congrats! great work. why do people keep saying that? because we've met humanity.

You Can't Undo It!

Today's comic may have accidentally doomed humanity.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens


red robot, metal steve, pale suzie : arms up, smile, human! quickly! what does pooping feel like? i'll never tell! you'll just use the secret of pooping against me. how could i possibly use knowledge of pooping to destroy humanity? oh! that's such a relief. gotcha. shit.

Forbidden Knowledge

HUMAN! QUICKLY! WHAT DOES POOPING FEEL LIKE???

What have we here?!

– @rstevens


metal steve, pale suzie : what do you put in your coffee? hopes. dreams. minimal water. i like whipped cream, cheetos dust and caramel syrup! i call it a chester cheetah du leche! i used to believe that none of us were truly beyond hope.

Crimes Against Caffeinity

Tonight's comic wants to know what you put in your coffee.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens


indie rock pete, metal steve, lil sis : across panels so it turns out the reason she doesn't like hanging out with me is because she's an introvert. no it isn't. i always knew that deep down, the problem isn't me- it's other people. NOT IT ISN'T.

Introblurt

Tonight's comic goes out to all the misdiagnosed introverts out there.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens


indie rock pete, lil sis : why don't you want to hang out? am i not fun?! it's not you, it's- -how much work it is to pretend to be nice to you. i knew it wasn't me!

Work, Friends

Tonight's comic wants to know why you don't want to hang out.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens


indie rock pete, lil sis : hey! doctor p.! i thought we were hanging out earlier. i didn't see your text. i emailed you. oh, right. that message went to spam. but you saw the email. this is easier than saying i don't want to hang out.

Scheduling Conflicts

Tonight's comic is having scheduling conflicts.

What have we here?!

– @rstevens


metal steve, lil sis : how are things? that is a great question! you're not going to answer? why risk making things worse?

Optimal Pessimism

So- How are things? (This is a conversation I have almost daily.)

What have we here?!

– @rstevens


otakate, lil sis : everything is terrible and i hate it. turn that frown inside-out! when things are bad, it's important to stay positive! you just don't want to hear me complain. that's one of many positive side effects!

The Blight Side of Life

Tonight's comic is about staying positive!!!!!!!

What have we here?!

– @rstevens


clango, red robot : feelings. misinterpretation of feelings as personal attack. reiteration of feelings. escalation of defensive response! pause to reflect feelings. how come you never open up to me? thought balloon

Infernal Dialogue

Tonight's comic is about feelings

What have we here?!

– @rstevens


metal steve, clango : the internet isn't working anymore. granted it has turned into a giant negativity machine... but i still like to think that the result of all these human connections is a net positive. i just need you to reboot the router. listen, i don't have enough positivity left that you can go around wasting it.

How to Fix the Internet

Tonight's comic knows how to fix the internet!

What have we here?!

– @rstevens




footr