I won't spoil for you what coffee really is. Read the comic.

I swear, it's a good thing – just kind of insane.

NO, it is not a kid.

Torpor and his amazing colorful cousins.

Night Coffee plays by different rules

Props to @karenkho for inventing the term as far as I’m aware! (And the doomscrolling twitter bot.)

LA LA LA LA I'm a human! I breathe air! I love pooping!

Will you be my Valentine?

I liked the internet better when it was websites.

If you had to give up coffee or chocolate, which would you choose?

I'm honestly not sure which direction would have better snacks.

I’m obsolete, disconnected from the internet, and THRIVING!

I finally understand you, Red Robot.

Any big plans for the new year???

I wonder if humanity will ever learn from its mistakes?

🧛‍♂️🪞 The end of the year is a great time to look back and reflect.

I set some lofty reading goals for myself this year!

Do you ever miss hanging out with people before smartphones?

***

Did I mention I've got a small run of Fuck It sweatpants back in stock? Because I do. They have pockets.

Thanksgiving isn't as much fun as it used to be.

I can't believe the year is almost over.

What happens when you drink coffee in the METAVERSE???

Tonight's comic is about the perils of opening up.

RARRGH! I'm Zombie Captain America!

Federation Pride pins are back – and glow command key pins are new!

Cool Venom costume!

(The Internet Got Worse)

Do you think I'm cool?

IN OTHER NEWS: I have a small print run of gonk gonk shirts in stock now

I'm going through one of those phases where I can't sleep more than six hours. IT'S GREAT!!!!!!!!!

Do you consider yourself a smart person?

I’m having feelings! And I don’t like it!

Is this what smoking in restaurants was like??

GONK GONK I'm taking preorders for a reprint of power droid shirts. Shipping in 2-3 weeks!

I need a new hobby!!

Should I still wear a mask??*

* This is rhetorical. You should.

Summer goes by so fast.

Whoa! It’s famous Time And Relative Dimension In Space celebrity Doctor Two!!

I hereby call this meeting of the society of small animals and electronics to order!

It’s too hot to sleep!

🍦⁉️ Where did you get ice cream?!

uh oh, it’s the nudity police!!

I remembered reading somewhere somebody saying that billionaires smelled really good, and this is where it went.

Remember kids: it's not a hookup unless they have an ethernet jack.

I should try drinking coffee outside the house again.

Notice anything different about me?

I really need a break from living through history.

🥸 It’s a bold, new world out there!

I know I'm supposed to want to be around people again, but...

Tonight’s comic h̶a̶s̶ ̶t̶o̶ 𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘴 𝘵𝘰 poop.

(fixed)

How is it MAY already?

I'm not sure I'm ready to go outside without a mask.

Nobody believes me when I say I’m vaccinated!

“It’s okay. I’m vaccinated.”

…

What to do when you spy a funny tweet on the inter-web.

Are you... a hugger?

Never stop screaming into the void.

Why are you so mad all the time, Red Robot?

🚽 Big day tomorrow! 🧻 Big day tomorrow!

"Ass" foretold by this prophecy.

Monetize your hobbies and you'll never work a day in your life.

Hydration is a scam!!

I worry that I've forgotten how to hang out with other people.

Tonight's comic is about the mystery of pooping.

I’ve stopped using days of the week.

Tonight’s comic loves to procrastinate.

Tonight’s comic loves podcasts.

How is a pandemic like freelancing?

What do cats really want?

People are (still) terrible.

What have we learned from all this soul-crushing bullshit?

Do you think you'll ever go back to working in an office?

How can Torpor make your life easier and/or better today?

There's nothing like getting up super early in the morning.

🤬🐈 Aww, they’re pretending to do twitters!

Are you as tired as I am, Menace-11?

Non-toastable carbohydrates.

Mew wanna go outside?

What's up, buttery blood beast?

Help! My views are being censored!!

I have decided to have a good day!!

I’m glad these two quarantined together so they could have someone to complain at.

How dare you unfollow me on the twitters!

Sure hope you like puns

When this is all over, I might keep wearing masks.

We join this misunderstanding currently in progress–

Maura is totally an essential worker!!

Are you still mad?

I can't believe you're not mad about the same thing I'm mad about!

You really don't like people, do you?

Can I complain for a minute?

CAN YOU HEAR ME I THINK I’M MUTED

Shout out to mechanical keyboards if you can hear me over all the racket

GATERON LOW PROFILE BROWN SWITCHES FOR LIFE

If you can think of a bleaker and more horrifying fate than being a youtuber, I’m all ears.

bad news: i've been drinking more.

Oh boy! My favorite podcast is live!

Don’t waste your time being friends with assholes

Don’t compromise with someone who wants to kill you.

Honk if you miss working at cafes

There's a party in my pants!

Should I get a new kitty?

This one vibrates.